Trivia NYC/DSO Media

With the first warming up of the large hadron collier today, soon those scientists in Switzerland are going to be re-creating the big bang, just to see what happens. This smacks of those times in my childhood when I & my brother would put our hamster, Herman, in the fridge until he went into hibernation, and then pop him in the oven to “thaw him out.”

Okay, we never did that. Also, I am not just saying that for plausible deniability.

Anyway, back on topic for a second. When they warm this LHC contraption up and start introducing protons into it in the next few days, then at some point, and even the people in charge don’t know where that point is, it may actually start a similar chain reaction to the one that started the universe the last time, however many billions of years ago (sorry, 6,000 years ago, as written in Genesis). Said reaction would be irreversible, and may cause the universe as we know it to close in upon itself. And humanity, the Earth, the universe, the Obamas, the Kardashians, bacon, Michael Phelps’ posse, the Milky Way galaxy, all future orgasms you and everyone you’ve been with will ever have, and your entire collection of Slayer albums, will all cease to exist without a trace.

Life is short. The human race is doomed to become extinct at some point. It’s astounding. Time is fleeting. Come on out to trivia tonight. Your mother and I miss you terribly.

Note: I Did Not Torture Hamsters As A Child. Seriously.

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Update: Keep checking this site for updates - http://hasthelargehadroncolliderdestroyedtheworldyet.com/

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